It was a good day. Norton, for those of you that don't know him, is
the old man that organizes the caving trips for the Sierra Club, and
occasionally he shows up at a few hashes. We named him "Norton"
from Ed Norton of the Honeymooners, in reference to his numerous
explorations of the Wilkinsburg sewer system, his "playground" when
he was growing up in those locales.
He makes a living as a "recycler", will purchase objects at garage
sales, and sell them at flea markets. He's been doing this for
twenty years, has no antique knowledge, no internet, no conventions,
no appraisers, no college degree. But, instinctively, has a "feel"
for what sells and for what price. So, today, we went to a couple
of garage sales, and he would cherry-pick a few objects from the
morass and layers upon layers of accumulation of someone that is
leaving their home and moving into an assisted-living home. Pay a
few bills for the items purchased, and hopefully, resell them for
just a few bills more. A recycler.
Then, we set out to a flea market near Bridgeville. There, he went
to see an old aquaintance, to whom he offered to sell some things
that only he could see and only he would be interested. It was a
box of videotapes of homo sex that he found on the curb down by the
street where he lives. Usually, he would sell any curb find at his
flea market stand, but this material, no, he wouldn't sell. So, he
made a person-to-person business visit, and he knew exactly who
would be interested. The potential buyer was indeed interested, and
the box with these tapes stayed with him.
By the flea market aisles, we looked at some old vintage stuff. He
would tell me what would sell and what would not sell. His "feel"
for prices comes mostly from recognizing items that he knows he has, asking for the price, and then, when it is he selling the same item, he has a better idea on what to ask.
Next, we set out for our "real" activity we set out to do this day:
urban caving. We targeted a few culverts to explore, and possibly
to be used for future hashes. We parked at a baseball field lot,
walked by the edge of the woods, and then, disappeared in the thick
greenery, quickly descending in a creek below. Following the creek
bed, we finally found the orefice, turned on the lights, and crawled
in. On the other side, we found still water, ankle deep, and thick
swamp plants. Then, another culvert, this one protected by
a "collection box" [maybe Spermit knows the real terminology], but
it was basically a concrete wall protecting the culvert opening. We
had to climb six feet to an opening above and hang and descend on
the other side, and went into the second culvert. On the other
side, we got to a bigger creek, following which, got us to a huge
culvert, ceiling was 12 feet high. At the end of which, another
culvert. Not bad, not bad.
Before returning to our parking location, we decided to explore some
fields and wooded area on that side of the road. We walked on and
about for about 40 minutes, until we stumbled into a residence, only
to startle the three male residents. One of them was farming a
vegetable garden. They didn't seem pleased to see us, and we
quickly returned to the trail we came from. Some 20 minutes later,
a ATV rider zipping by without helmet, we recognized him as being
one of the three, he was checking us out. We just waved a hand at
him, and he just waved a hand at us. Norton observes how unusual is
to find a house with three guys living together, and one of them is
farming vegetables.
We retrace our steps to the giant culvert, and decide on taking the
most direct route out of the creek, up a very steep wooded slope.
We emerge out of the thick vegetation on a road, with parked cars
and a hotel. We see BMW convertibles, blond women in suburbanite
attire, and a sign, "Welcome to Monster Bash 2007". It's a horror
and sci-fi Monster Bash convention.
I see a guy walking in my direction carrying a vintage set of a
1970's game, Haunted House.I ask him if one has to pay to get
in. He says he can give me his pass. He sees Norton, and gives him
another pass. Nice guy. I hope he has fun with his new
toy.
We go in. There is a Dracula impersonator greeting us. Sellers
abound, selling T-shirt, DVD, autographed movie photos, Planet-of-
the-Apes toy models, masks, face-painting. We attend a couple of
presentations. One guy tells stories of Bela Lugosi, another is the
actor that played "Jaws", the bad guy in the James Bond movie "The
Spy That Loved Me".
We are going around the rooms and aisles and convention rooms with our "sewer" clothes, wet from the knee down. One character that I see often in the sellers portfolio of vintage 1950's movie posters is some kind of swamp mud monster. "That's us", I note.
One of the sellers is selling an entire set of Planet of the Apes miniature model , with the original 1974 cardboard box, all in
pristine condition. He wants $200. The fact pricks Norton's ear,
next time he's scavenging some basement in SqHill on a estate sale,
he'll be looking for those toy sets.
We leave the convention with a full knowledge of the genre, and of
the people that will drive or fly distances and pay hotel rooms to
attend these events. It's a niche market.
The day is still young, and there is room for more culvert
exploration. We have the topo maps for another area, and we park
behind a school/baseball field near Aliquippa. The creek below is a
tough one, full of jaggers, PI, and downed trees. It is not a fun
choice. We finally arrive at the culvert, get to the other side,
conjunction with another creek, upstream that to a bigger culvert,
and then, a side stream and culvert back to the side where we
parked.
Walking upstream a creek in the approximate direction of our
vehicle, we are greeted by a barking dog that rushes to us, followed
by his owner, who sentences us with "Do you know you are in private
property?" no, we didn't [true]. He said he has signs. We say we
didn't see any [true]. "I have 200 posted signs, so don't give me
that bulls--t, so get out of my property", and he walks away. We
quickly cued the compass to get us back to the baseball field, and
we were out of there. Beaver County, you are not our friend.
Well, driving back to pgh, to sum out this day and scouting mission,
seven culverts, a free pass to a horror convention, a personal sales
call to a gay man, getting chewed up by a landowner, and seeing
people salivate to a $200 toy set made in 1974 showing a bunch of
miniature models of primate-looking humanoids, one of them
named "Cornelius".
It was a good day.
Monster Bash guests
Monster culverts
Aliquippa culverts
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Highlights of the Monster Bash:
9:30PM - OUTDOOR MOVIE: THE WOLF MAN! Drive-in style. We will show the film on the lawn out back by the woods. Bring some "Off bug repellent, " a blanket and your portable FM radio. We'll broadcast the audio on an FM frequency. Introduced by Dee Ankers-Denning, daughter of THE WOLF MAN's heroine Evelyn Ankers! Special thanks to Drive-In historian Mark Bialek and projectionist Geoffrey Curtis for making this happen. And, make sure to check out Mark's Drive-In Web areas at www.driveintheatre.org!
8:00AM - MONSTER BASH MASS. Father Mike (yes, a real priest from Ohio) performs a mass for Bash attendees that can't make it out to fimd a church. All denominations are welcome. How often do you find a priest that's a big Bela Lugosi fan?! Perhaps....something VERY special this year too - IT'S A WEDDING MASS! Author Lenonard Kohl and his beautiful bride Dana!
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